We all know what it is like when you break up with your girlfriend, at that moment you are at a loss. The next thing you begin to do is think how to get her back; this can become an issue if those actions become desperate.

Then of course you try calling and she does not pick up. The more she ignores your calls the more upset you find yourself getting. As the feeling of rejection creeps in your actions become more desperate.

One thing after another can lead to making even more mistakes, making the possibility of getting back with your ex even more challenging. The first critical step you need to take is to take some time out. Do not call your ex just let things settle down.

Step number two is to talk things over with friends, especially mutual friends, as they may be able to give you some good advice. In the case of mutual friends they may be able to talk to your ex to see what is going on. In this step your gathering information and you’re not hounding your ex, with this information you can discover what is at the root of the problem.

Now for step number three. Based on the fact that you are acting more responsibly in trying to figure out where things went wrong, the clock is ticking giving you more time to get your head on straight, continue with your life and make the right decisions moving forward.

When you act responsibly rather than running around like a headless chicken you will give the impression that you are getting your act together by working things out. Your ex at this point after not hearing from you may think that she could actually lose and might contact you. Often times break ups can just be a test.

The breaking up of the relationship can become a test to see who is committed and who is not. If one partner feels they are going to lose the other then the whole situation can change.

Last but not least once you have gathered your thoughts it is now time to contact your ex. Give her a call and when you start to talk, discuss general topics, do not discuss the relationship, then say that you have to go and maybe suggest a coffee or let her make the move to meet again. Then when you do you can go into more detail, however the key is to make the situation comfortable so that she can say what is on he mind.

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